2537 South 25 East
Ammon, ID 8340
My fondest memory of Cafe Rio ended in vomiting strawberry milkshake all over a parking lot. No, Cafe Rio does not sell milkshakes. It does, however, craft one of the finer enchilada-style, barbacoa pork burritos of any Mexican-ish chain restaurant that I know. Sound like a mouthful? It is.
Which brings me back to my point. The milkshake, the damn milkshake. It was the one thing that came between me and competitive eating glory – I did have my day, mind you. During my younger, more competitive, years I did claim several victories that included 50 Wendy's nuggets in less than 10 minutes, and back-to-back Barbacoa burritos. The day that marked my final showdown (and ultimate defeat) began one fine afternoon with a challenge: meal for meal till someone dropped out. My competitor didn't seem to have much of a chance. I had a good 40 lbs. on him and to this point I'd never seen proof of his capabilities. He did have one critical ability of which I was not aware, his inhuman capacity to stomach dairy.
The competition began with a headfirst dive in into the famed enchilada-style barbacoa pork burrito.
Without question, this is a sufficient meal for two normal eaters. The tortillas are made on site and the pork is marinated in a delectable blend of sweet and spicy.
The recipe can be found here. I highly recommend whipping up a few pounds of it and figuring out a way to integrate it into every meal for one week. Another noteworthy item on the menu is the salad. It is basically a burrito with a little bit of lettuce that hasn't been wrapped up.
Think of Cafe Rio as a less healthy Chipotle, which makes it way better and more cheese covered.
Back to the eating challenge. After violently consuming a burrito each, my competitor and I worked our way down the block. Next up was a large Quizno's sandwich each. I honestly thought this would be as far as this competition would go, but we breezed right through it. Both eager to defend our title, our sights turned to Crown Burger. This would ultimately be my demise. How this little dude was still in the running was beyond me, though I should have taken note that many reigning eating champions are not usually very big. Takeru Kobayashi, weighing in at only 136 pounds, held the title of Nathan's Annual Hot Dog Eating Contest for 6 years. Whatever the case, dairy has no place in a competition of any kind. And worse yet, don't mix beans and enchilada sauce with strawberry syrup and ice cream. It's kind of like mentos and diet coke, but with beans!
The truth is that I lost fair and square. I lost my eating title while crying/puking behind a greasy burger place. It was pathetic.